Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Randomize