i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
