i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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