Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
