I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
