Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize