No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
