A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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