Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
