u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
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