For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
