yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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