therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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