i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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