Welp...herpes.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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