she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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