He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
