I have demons in me.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
