Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
