Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize