It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
