There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
