cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
