Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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