Small penises have feelings too.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
