I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
We have so much sex to catch up on
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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