So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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