Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
