I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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