i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
