I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Randomize
