I wish my penis had an off switch
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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