if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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