I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
