I swear she didn't look like that last week.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
