well most of my day revolves around power hour
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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