ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize