so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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