Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
