Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
