i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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