Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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