I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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