i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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