out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I just want nice things and good sex
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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