she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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