i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
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