Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
