no you cant smoke seaweed
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize