i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
she told me i tasted like america
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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