I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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