somebody snuck up and got me drunk
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Randomize
