He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
